A mother from Seattle, Washington, has shared her heartbreaking story with Love What Matters to raise awareness about shaken baby syndrome.
In her first-person emotional article, Angie Setlak explained that after a "stressful pregnancy because her father was not faithful to me," and that her blood pressure was affected, her son Xavier "was born four weeks earlier because he was not growing up. "His son was born healthy, but he spent 16 days in the NICU before returning home. Everything was "perfect" for three months, Setlak wrote, but it all ended on his first day back from maternity leave.
"I had been texting Xavier's father all day about how difficult it was being, and I told his father we would find another solution so he would not have to watch him during the day," he wrote. "While I was on maternity leave, Xavier's father had been alone with him for two hours at the most, and everything had been fine, his father worked at night, and the plan was to watch Xavier during the day while I worked , and then I watched him in the night when he worked, my former partner had raised a 10-year-old boy after all, so even though I was very nervous about the situation, he assured me that everything would be fine. " She says it never occurred to her that her baby could be in danger, but at one point, Xavier's father sent her a text message asking "if I could now kill the baby." She assured him that she would soon be at home.
"I kept thinking, 'Just a few more hours and then I can be home with my baby,'" Setlak said. "Then, at 2:30, I received the message that all mothers expect to never receive." Xavier stopped breathing. Now come home. "I called his father and asked him what had happened, to which he replied:" He choked on the milk and I will go to the children's hospital in Seattle. "I gathered my things, I drowned my tears and went to the hospital. I heard my baby cry, so I thought everything would be alright There was a room full of all the doctors for my little 10 pound baby After things had calmed down, they let me get close to him and take his hand. Suddenly I was calm and pale, I knew something was not right. " The doctors finally confirmed that Xavier's brain was bleeding. In a fit of rage, the boy's father had shaken him and the baby was in a medically induced coma, suffering from seizures. "I heard everything, from" I could be blind "to" maybe I can never learn, walk, talk, move ... "Setlak wrote." But I still knew he would come back with me. "
Seventeen days later, Xavier received permission to go home. "His father was arrested the night of the first-degree child abuse injury," Setlak said. "I still do not know the details of what happened that day, and I do not know if I will ever do it." Since we are almost three months away from the injury, I focus less on the "why" and more on the now. '"
She explained that she tries to be "present" with her son and that she "thanks God every day for bringing my baby". The young child continues to attend weekly physiotherapy and occupational therapy. "He has a neurologist," Setlak wrote. "An ophthalmologist, a neurodevelopmental specialist, is in speech therapy and now he's going to go to Anat Baniel Method therapy to help wake up his brain and reconnect it." Everyone keeps telling me how lucky we are of this while he was so young. how hard the babies are and how plastic the brain is at this age.You have a high risk of developing Cerebral Palsy, but we will not get that diagnosis for another 1.5 years, if you have it.Go to people in advance. of intervention, and I firmly believe that the more we work with him, the better his chances will be. "
The optimistic mom tells Parents.com that she shared her story so that people know that this can happen to anyone. "We watched the videos about PURPLE Crying," he shares. "I thought things like this did not happen to 'people like me.' And I left him in the care of the person who should love him and take care of him, not hurt him, I understand that I feel frustrated, I do it, I felt frustrated with him when I did not leave to cry, but that's the reason, they teach you how to lower the baby and get away. "
Setlak explained it in his Love What Matters article: "You're going to cry somewhere, you scream or talk to someone, you take out your frustrations, and then you come back with your sweet baby and you start again." To this day, Xavier still screams And there are times when I have to leave and walk away, because that is what you do as a parent, I hope that someone who reads our story takes everything seriously and realizes how important it is not to shake a baby. Whatever happens, you never shake a baby. It is so easy to avoid. A moment of anger changed my baby forever. "
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